Happiness
is one thing everyone craves for either explicitly or implicitly.
In fact
one would give anything in return for always having a happy emotion.
I
strongly feel that everyone approaches happiness as a goal rather than as an
experience. Which is why probably people miss the whole thing.
The
whole point is that happiness does not exist outside of us and it is totally
within ourselves. It is there in that deep reserve of emotions that we possess
and is concealed in layers and layers of other emotions and tends to be at the
bottom most layer waiting for an outward stimuli to pull it out of its depths
onto our face or mind.
Which
is why happiness is experienced only together with ecstasy since a mega event
is required to prise it out from the depths of consciousness.
This
happiness tends to last temporarily for its nature is more physical than
emotional.
True
happiness is achieved only when the emotion of Happiness pervades all our other
emotions.
Wait a
minute I am not advocating that one should try to be happy overcoming or
suppressing all other emotions. It is not only impossible but also pretty trite
to show a wrong emotion at the wrong place.
What I
mean is that the emotion of Happiness should act more like a traffic cop in
regulating the other emotions in our mind and ensure that each of these
emotions exist with a finite shelf life or expiry timestamp.
This
kind of happiness is more to do with being contended with what results one gets
for any effort and all that should matter at the end of it is a honesty of
purpose and intention that backs the effort.
I have
seen, and still see, so many close people suffer in life owing to comparison of
their lot with that of others as to how theirs is bad or those of others is
better.
I was
not an exception when it comes to being trapped with these emotions. But a
serious introspection of these emotions while being trapped opened my eyes to
the fact that the mind is in a trap.
This
trap simply stops you from thinking positively and makes you to try and
showcase yourself as a success in areas that your heart actually does not want
you to be successful at.
You
stop chasing your heart and end up chasing your newly established goals
thinking that will bring you out of this trap. It unfortunately leads you only
to a maze of more stronger emotions that take you farther away from the real
person that you are.
I
stopped comparing myself with anyone after a few incidents made me realize the
total emptiness of the approach of comparison.
Just
think for a minute, the same mind that craves for a good result to happen to
oneself when you see someone known to you experiencing the same, silently prays
to God wanting him not to make you a victim of a mishap that happens to another
person.
Why is
it that we suffer in comparison only by wanting all the good things that happen
to others to happen to us also.
It is
only because (a) We are hardwired to chase happiness at the subconscious level
and (b) We also have an externalized concept of happiness etched on our mind
that it is a sum total of all the positive results that happen to us in life.
And the
reason why happiness is therefore elusive to us is that most of the time
results are totally an outcome of factors beyond our immediate control, which
is why we all still pray to God.
So what
then is the secret of all time happiness...Simple, look no further, look inside
you and dig really deep.
Detach
yourself from results and attach yourself to your inner reserves and strengths
that give you the fortitude and maturity to face any situation be it positive
or negative.
The
more you are aligned to enjoying the efforts you put in rather than saving the
enjoyment for later once a positive result is achieved for your effort, the
more you will get close to experiencing happiness in a majority portion of your
lifetime.
Of
course results do matter and they can cause a negative emotion to flow out.
But the
detachment from results will ensure that happiness will persist in your mind
and ensure that the negative emotions are packed off after a normal expiry
period. And gradually but surely you will find that life moves on and most
importantly in a direction aligned to goals that are more closer to your heart.
I am an
Accountant by core competence (although not by profession) and my version of Karma is the theory that everyone's life is a balance sheet.
In other words we all have an equal amount of positive and negative things that will occur to offset one another.
In other words we all have an equal amount of positive and negative things that will occur to offset one another.
I do
not mean that all of us will get the same amount of positive and negative
things.
Instead everybody will get as much positive results as they got negative results at an individual level.
Instead everybody will get as much positive results as they got negative results at an individual level.
This
thought process helps me look forward to positive things when I am on a trough
of life and stay grounded when I am on a high, both of which are important to
break the mind to face the cycle.
I was
able to achieve a lot of stability in my emotions, thanks to this approach and
today I can look back and feel proud to realize that I have faced quite a lot
of emotional challenges with fortitude and the resulting release of tension
ensured that my life goes on in a direction aligned to my heart than my ego.
Most
importantly this changed the way I prayed. I greatly reduced asking for
favorable outcomes and instead prayed for the divine presence within me to
ensure that I continue to have the maturity to implement this thought process
irrespective of outcomes.
Good
luck in implementing this thought framework as suitable to events in your life.
Cheers,
Mahesh